Let’s talk about prayer.
First a confession:
I don’t pray. (When I write it down like that, it really does not look good.)
But let me explain. I find it very difficult. I feel self-conscious when I pray. My doubts quickly get in the way. Half way in the prayer I start to question the images about God popping up. I think I need a good pop-up blocker the next time I try. When I pray my mind wanders and before I know it, I am busy buying groceries, writing my next post, thinking of the dogs, planting vegetables or planning our next holiday, all the while my brain switched to autopilot prayer mode.
Still there is a longing in me to pray.
This longing is not new. One of the old thinkers in the Christian faith said that our hearts are restless until we find our rest in God. He talked about a God-shaped gap that we drag along in life. God created us in such a way that we can’t help yearning for God.
I am not alone on this journey. I know there are others out there who struggle with prayer, but yearn for God.
That's why I am going to stick around this theme for a while, hoping (praying...) that a restless heart (and mind) will find peace.